- Avoid a succession of loose sentences.
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| This rule refers especially to loose sentences of a particular type, those consisting of two co-ordinate clauses, the second introduced by a conjunction or relative. Although single sentences of this type may be unexceptionable (see under Rule 4), a series soon becomes monotonous and tedious. |
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| An unskilful writer will sometimes construct a whole paragraph of sentences of this kind, using as connectives and, but, and less frequently, who, which, when, where, and while, these last in non-restrictive senses (see under Rule 3). |
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| The third concert of the subscription series was given last evening, and a large audience was in attendance. Mr. Edward Appleton was the soloist, and the Boston Symphony Orchestra furnished the instrumental music. The former showed himself to be an artist of the first rank, while the latter proved itself fully deserving of its high reputation. The interest aroused by the series has been very gratifying to the Committee, and it is planned to give a similar series annually hereafter. The fourth concert will be given on Tuesday, May 10, when an equally attractive programme will be presented. |
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| Apart from its triteness and emptiness, the paragraph above is bad because of the structure of its sentences, with their mechanical symmetry and sing-song. Contrast with them the sentences in the paragraphs quoted under Rule 10, or in any piece of good English prose, as the preface (Before the Curtain) to Vanity Fair. |
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| If the writer finds that he has written a series of sentences of the type described, he should recast enough of them to remove the monotony, replacing them by simple sentences, by sentences of two clauses joined by a semicolon, by periodic sentences of two clauses, by sentences, loose or periodic, of three clauses—whichever best represent the real relations of the thought. |
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- Express co-ordinate ideas in similar form.
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| This principle, that of parallel construction, requires that expressions of similar content and function should be outwardly similar. The likeness of form enables the reader to recognize more readily the likeness of content and function. Familiar instances from the Bible are the Ten Commandments, the Beatitudes, and the petitions of the Lord's Prayer. |
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| The unskilful writer often violates this principle, from a mistaken belief that he should constantly vary the form of his expressions. It is true that in repeating a statement in order to emphasize it he may have need to vary its form. For illustration, see the paragraph from Stevenson quoted under Rule 10. But apart from this, he should follow the principle of parallel construction. |
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| Formerly, science was taught by the textbook method, while now the laboratory method is employed. |
Formerly, science was taught by the textbook method; now it is taught by the laboratory method. |
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| The left-hand version gives the impression that the writer is undecided or timid; he seems unable or afraid to choose one form of expression and hold to it. The right-hand version shows that the writer has at least made his choice and abided by it. |
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| By this principle, an article or a preposition applying to all the members of a series must either be used only before the first term or else be repeated before each term. |
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| The French, the Italians, Spanish, and Portuguese |
The French, the Italians, the Spanish, and the Portuguese |
| In spring, summer, or in winter |
In spring, summer, or winter (In spring, in summer, or in winter) |
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| Correlative expressions (both, and; not, but; not only, but also; either, or; first, second, third; and the like) should be followed by the same grammatical construction. Many violations of this rule can be corrected by rearranging the sentence. |
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| It was both a long ceremony and very tedious. |
The ceremony was both long and tedious. |
| A time not for words, but action |
A time not for words, but for action |
| Either you must grant his request or incur his ill will. |
You must either grant his request or incur his ill will. |
| My objections are, first, the injustice of the measure; second, that it is unconstitutional. |
My objections are, first, that the measure is unjust; second, that it is unconstitutional. |
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| See also the third example under Rule 12 and the last under Rule 13. |
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| It may be asked, what if a writer needs to express a very large number of similar ideas, say twenty? Must he write twenty consecutive sentences of the same pattern? On closer examination he will probably find that the difficulty is imaginary, that his twenty ideas can be classified in groups, and that he need apply the principle only within each group. Otherwise he had best avoid the difficulty by putting his statements in the form of a table. |
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- Keep related words together.
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| The position of the words in a sentence is the principal means of showing their relationship. The writer must therefore, so far as possible, bring together the words, and groups of words, that are related in thought, and keep apart those which are not so related. |
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| The subject of a sentence and the principal verb should not, as a rule, be separated by a phrase or clause that can be transferred to the beginning. |
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| Wordsworth, in the fifth book of The Excursion, gives a minute description of this church. |
In the fifth book of The Excursion, Wordsworth gives a minute description of this church. |
| Cast iron, when treated in a Bessemer converter, is changed into steel. |
By treatment in a Bessemer converter, cast iron is changed into steel. |
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| The objection is that the interposed phrase or clause needlessly interrupts the natural order of the main clause. This objection, however, does not usually hold when the order is interrupted only by a relative clause or by an expression in apposition. Nor does it hold in periodic sentences in which the interruption is a deliberately used means of creating suspense (see examples under Rule 18). |
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| The relative pronoun should come, as a rule, immediately after its antecedent. |
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| There was a look in his eye that boded mischief. |
In his eye was a look that boded mischief. |
| He wrote three articles about his adventures in Spain, which were published in Harper's Magazine. |
He published in Harper's Magazine three articles about his adventures in Spain. |
| This is a portrait of Benjamin Harrison, grandson of William Henry Harrison, who became President in 1889. |
This is a portrait of Benjamin Harrison, grandson of William Henry Harrison. He became President in 1889. |
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| If the antecedent consists of a group of words, the relative comes at the end of the group, unless this would cause ambiguity. |
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| The Superintendent of the Chicago Division, who |
| A proposal to amend the Sherman Act, which has been variously judged |
A proposal, which has been variously judged, to amend the Sherman Act |
| A proposal to amend the much-debated Sherman Act |
| The grandson of William Henry Harrison, who |
William Henry Harrison's grandson, Benjamin Harrison, who |
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| A noun in apposition may come between antecedent and relative, because in such a combination no real ambiguity can arise. |
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| The Duke of York, his brother, who was regarded with hostility by the Whigs |
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| Modifiers should come, if possible next to the word they modify. If several expressions modify the same word, they should be so arranged that no wrong relation is suggested. |
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| All the members were not present. |
Not all the members were present. |
| He only found two mistakes. |
He found only two mistakes. |
| Major R. E. Joyce will give a lecture on Tuesday evening in Bailey Hall, to which the public is invited, on "My Experiences in Mesopotamia" at eight P. M. |
On Tuesday evening at eight P. M., Major R. E. Joyce will give in Bailey Hall a lecture on "My Experiences in Mesopotamia." The public is invited. |
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- In summaries, keep to one tense.
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| In summarizing the action of a drama, the writer should always use the present tense. In summarizing a poem, story, or novel, he should preferably use the present, though he may use the past if he prefers. If the summary is in the present tense, antecedent action should be expressed by the perfect; if in the past, by the past perfect. |
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| An unforeseen chance prevents Friar John from delivering Friar Lawrence's letter to Romeo. Juliet, meanwhile, owing to her father's arbitrary change of the day set for her wedding, has been compelled to drink the potion on Tuesday night, with the result that Balthasar informs Romeo of her supposed death before Friar Lawrence learns of the nondelivery of the letter. |
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| But whichever tense be used in the summary, a past tense in indirect discourse or in indirect question remains unchanged. |
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| The Legate inquires who struck the blow. |
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| Apart from the exceptions noted, whichever tense the writer chooses, he should use throughout. Shifting from one tense to the other gives the appearance of uncertainty and irresolution (compare Rule 15). |
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| In presenting the statements or the thought of some one else, as in summarizing an essay or reporting a speech, the writer should avoid intercalating such expressions as "he said," "he stated," "the speaker added," "the speaker then went on to say," "the author also thinks," or the like. He should indicate clearly at the outset, once for all, that what follows is summary, and then waste no words in repeating the notification. |
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| In notebooks, in newspapers, in handbooks of literature, summaries of one kind or another may be indispensable, and for children in primary schools it is a useful exercise to retell a story in their own words. But in the criticism or interpretation of literature the writer should be careful to avoid dropping into summary. He may find it necessary to devote one or two sentences to indicating the subject, or the opening situation, of the work he is discussing; he may cite numerous details to illustrate its qualities. But he should aim to write an orderly discussion supported by evidence, not a summary with occasional comment. Similarly, if the scope of his discussion includes a number of works, he will as a rule do better not to take them up singly in chronological order, but to aim from the beginning at establishing general conclusions. |
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- Place the emphatic words of a sentence at the end.
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| The proper place for the word, or group of words, which the writer desires to make most prominent is usually the end of the sentence. |
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| Humanity has hardly advanced in fortitude since that time, though it has advanced in many other ways. |
Humanity, since that time, has advanced in many other ways, but it has hardly advanced in fortitude. |
| This steel is principally used for making razors, because of its hardness. |
Because of its hardness, this steel is principally used in making razors. |
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| The word or group of words entitled to this position of prominence is usually the logical predicate, that is, the new element in the sentence, as it is in the second example. |
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| The effectiveness of the periodic sentence arises from the prominence which it gives to the main statement. |
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| Four centuries ago, Christopher Columbus, one of the Italian mariners whom the decline of their own republics had put at the service of the world and of adventure, seeking for Spain a westward passage to the Indies as a set-off against the achievements of Portuguese discoverers, lighted on America. |
| With these hopes and in this belief I would urge you, laying aside all hindrance, thrusting away all private aims, to devote yourselves unswervingly and unflinchingly to the vigorous and successful prosecution of this war. |
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| The other prominent position in the sentence is the beginning. Any element in the sentence, other than the subject, becomes emphatic when placed first. |
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| Deceit or treachery he could never forgive. |
| So vast and rude, fretted by the action of nearly three thousand years, the fragments of this architecture may often seem, at first sight, like works of nature. |
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| A subject coming first in its sentence may be emphatic, but hardly by its position alone. In the sentence, |
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| Great kings worshipped at his shrine, |
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| the emphasis upon kings arises largely from its meaning and from the context. To receive special emphasis, the subject of a sentence must take the position of the predicate. |
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| Through the middle of the valley flowed a winding stream. |
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| The principle that the proper place for what is to be made most prominent is the end applies equally to the words of a sentence, to the sentences of a paragraph, and to the paragraphs of a composition. |
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